LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Okay you guys, I've been seeing seeing this gal for almost a year now. She's an american citizen, I'm not even a citi-bank account holder. -.- It started off as a fling for me but she apparently has been in love with me ever since our first date. After a few dates, I really got to know her.. and we kept getting closer and closer. For a few months now I've been feeling like we are married or something we act like a total married couple.. checking in wth each other all the time, cute lil talks 3 am in the morn.. sneaking out to meet each other etc etc. She has always.. ALWAYS talked about wanting to get married.. I never took it seriously... until a few days ago when she practically started crying thinking of the thought that one day we might break up or something. But anyway...

MY QUESTION!!!!....

SHE was married to this guy.. they had a kid together. The kid is now 2 years old. IF.. IF IF... We end up getting married.... how long does it usually take until I have my G card in my hands with my name and photo printed on the first page? (: does it vary by different states or something?

BIG IF IF IF... If things don't work out... which I'm sad to say.. it most likely won't more than a few years maybe? Cuz me and her are totally different. She's a nice girl... can be pretty bad at times. She's very needy... me? I like my freedom.. I'm a a big jerk sometimes.. she started off loving that about me but cmon... u can only take so much attitude. And I'm pretty young.. and watch wayy too many bollywood moves... so I don't see myself changing too much very soon lol!

SO... IF IT DOESN'T work out... DIVORCE! ??

MY OTHER QUESTION....
If we end up ending things... how does it work out for me? I'm worried cuz of the kid and all... I can't afford any alimony or child support! Am i liable for the kid even if he's her previous husbands? What about my if-to-be-wife? Would I be liable to pay her in anyway? I don't know much about this marriage law business as you can probably tell. I guess I'm a total virgin :P lol! This whole situation sounds like a nightmare.. that is one of the BIG reasons I'm trying not to get too close to her. What if I fall for her? Marry her! And then later things don't work out? Am i stuck in loveless marriage? I mean I LOVE KIDS... and more importantly they love me... but still gotta think about the future. Does this vary state to state too or something?

PLEASE HELP ME HELP MYSELF!

P.S. She's a Latina, I'm an Indian.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Buddy, as much as we are raised with this machista mentality that the woman is always going to be submissive, I would say that you just leave her. Things are going to get sticky really quick if you end up with her. Just by the things you are saying it seems like she is a bit unstable and her personality is going to be incompatible with yours in the long run. I know it sounds cynical and you want to fix your migratory situation but this is just not going to hurt you and her, but any children that is caught in the crossfire. My 2 cents only, I hope you not only take advise from me but from other people as well. Best of luck.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

willnevermarryasinglemom/10 don't be a cuck and raise another man's child.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Are you still in high school or something

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Very very similiar experience of what i went through before daca. From fellow dreamer to follow dreamer. Dont do it. Its a living hell not worth the gc. My 2 cents.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Yeah but dude, I can't be too picky here. We don't know how long DACA will last. I hope FOREVER!!! But we gotta think smart... we gotta take advantage of daca.. get a good job, nice car, be able to go places.. meet people we ABSOLUTELY wouldn't have without the ability to drive or work. We gotta be out fishing fr the golden opportunity fr our future, a way to make this permanent.

Also like a wise man has once said.. marry the person that loves you.. not the person you love. U get the idea here... I was thinking I can try things out, and if it doesn't work.. at least i got something out of it. A fearless life= GC! But the kid is the only thing I'm worried about.. not of how this may affect him.. but sorry to be a realistic douche here... but how...-if-divorced... will affect me. Please help me decide.. with legal facts atleast! That's that my whole decision now will be based on.. since I'm not even letting myself get too close to her. If it turns out I'd be off the hook.. i won't hold back.. let my feelings for her open up.

Sorry, brah I'm a modern kinda guy... I'm not afraid of commitments/raising another mans child/ or even a bigg public break up even. Just feel like its time I have to start thinking about my future. This Drumpf guy is the scare we all needed.. now that it has opened up my eyes.. he can stop now. Drop off already lol!

Nope I'm 24. She is 23. Why? Do I sound like a kid or something? Lol

Bro u gotta tell me in detail. I need major convincing advice lol! Why what did u go through? Or were going to.. what changed your mind? U must be for it at some point.. what made it such hell??

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Good luck brotha, I know someone who went through the marriage route like hell, it sucks. Make sure you suck up to her since she will have all the power going through the GC process.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Thanks brahther maan. I see what you're saying. But how come every one keeps saying this is the route to hell but no one is willing to explain the reasoning being it. And as for being a suck up.. I think she does enough of that. No pun intended. She's always running behind me about everything.. another big issue I can could happen is that she'll fall hard for me. What if in the future I'm really not into it anymore... what if she doesn't wanna leave me? How will that work? I know u guys are probably thinking why I keep assuming that I'm gonna end up leaving her... cuz I know how I am... I'm looking for that perfect bolly chick.. but most likely she'll be on the same boat as me. I'm pursuing this because of the benifits and how comfortable I feel with her now... I always think about the future... and also try to prepare for the worst. So hence my frustration.. :/

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Wow just wow....
That's all I got to say.

Re: LIFE DECISION! HELP!! Marrying a CITIZEN.. she's a single mother
 

Too be honest, I would marry her. Just suck it up and secure your future.