Do not know...whats going to happen
 

Hey everyone,

I just want to share an incident with you guys which I have gone through past months. I hope after listening to this, no one here will make a mistake like I did.

I am a sophomore in college. I was with my gf for about 2 years 6 months, i really loved her and I was assured that she does the same. She is a US citizen. I told her about my out of status situation before we started going out and fell in love. That time she told me its not a problem and she would help me in every situation she could. I introduced her to my family when i was assured by her that she is as serious as i am with her. I had no intentions of marrying her just for my GC. Soon, I found her cheating on me and I was really upset. I talked to her about it and she said she doesnt want to be with me. I am a emotional person, I really got angry when i found out that she was also sleeping with him too. I could not control myself & i slapped her. I did this just because i felt betrayed and i really loved her...i did not expected this from her. Its been 2 months since this happened.

2 days ago, she called me and told me that she will get me deported soon with my family. I couldn't contact her back asking why she is doing this for and what she wants. I get text messages on my phone with blocked #'s saying enjoy your last days in US, you will be sent back soon, and that she has complained about me to ICE.

My whole family knows about this, we are really really upset and we cant express how we feel at this time. We have no support and there is nothing much we can do about it. I feel our house and all the stuff will be just left here to rot if something miserable happen to us. The feeling of this is killing me inside.

Please pray for me, & for your self that nothing like this happens with you guys. Any advice or messages are welcomed. God Bless.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

Damn, the only advice i can give you is to move from your current address . Slapping her in the first place was a very bad idea, now it's coming back to haunt you.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

Slapping her was a wrong move dude...idk maybe shes bluffing

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

I have an online rule about not commenting on anyone's personality,but this is definitely pushing it.

I'll just comment on the consequences.


ICE does not investigate Battery,The crime that you have committed would be up to the local police NOT ICE.The crime you have committed if charged by the local police is the equivalent of an aggravated felony under INA & would likely face a permanent bar on all immigration benefits if she has reported it,you would also obviously not qualify for the Dream act.

I also think laneDearIhope? might be on to something,if she called ICE why warn you about it ?

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

^I concur, I'd be worried about criminal charges with the local police, which may or may not lead to ICE.

Sorry dude, you lost any leverage you had when you laid your hands on her.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

First of all it's the police that you have to worry about. No offense but there's really no excuse for slapping her.

Going after your family just makes her immature, they had nothing to do with it.

Yeah the fact that she waited 2 months is scary. She seems really immature and kind of crazy. I have a feeling if she's immature and petty enough to go after your family or be stupid enough to send you text messages. She's the type of person who is too lazy to go down to the police station fill out a police report. The police and people who decide to prosecute probably won't do anything if she waits too long.

As for ICE, here is what will happen. She will call if she's not too lazy too look up the phone number and unless she has info on your workplace they probably won't do anything. If she has info on your workplace (if you work), that could mean a possible raid on your workplace which would really screw over your employer if you have one. What about your parents workplace? Does she know about that?

Also did you enter on a visa (even if you didn't) you will not be deported rather put into removal proceedings which last anywhere from a few months to a few years but most likely will end in an order to leave.

I don't know, if you think she's serious, move and change jobs. It's a huge price your family may have to pay for your mistake.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

why wait two months though?

If she was really furious about what you did, i think she would have done something about it right away when the anger was..."fresh".
Why wouldnt she fill a police report right after you slapped her??
Unless she can hold grudges...

I do think shes bluffing too.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

oh jesus! thank god my ex-gf isnt like that..

Oh man, this is bad, really bad. yeah, u should definitely move right away. I don't know what else to tell you, sorry.

I can understand the anger and frustration you had when u find out she was cheating on you, because I was kind of being cheated on too. I can also understand why u slapped her, because I almost did too. But instead, I just pulled her out of my car at that time, like i was really pulling. I admit I did let my emotions got the better of me at that time.

Anyway, that incident happened almost 6 months ago. Looking back, I really shouldn't have done what I did, even though we were really pushing each other's limits. But the important thing to take away here isn't about what u did or didn't do; the important thing is take all the things you've learned from this experience and move on to be a better person. It is also critical to be able to assess yourself. Ask yourself how would you react better should a similar situation arises again(not saying that i hope to)??

I spoke to my ex-gf yesterday after a long while. The conversation was weird at first, but it got smoother as it went along. We had forgiven each other(she has a bf now). I felt like although we had done many many things to hurt each other, the bond is still there. After all, we had gone through a lot in the 3 years we spent together. Yes, we may never be a couple again(yes, i still miss her), but that's okay, because I'm just grateful to have her as my friend. To me, someone who has helped you through your hardships and support you all she could is really rare and precious. And I will do anything to hold on to that relationship/friendship with her, even if it means she's sleeping with another guy. The ironic thing is that the guy she's with now is the guy she kinda cheated on me with. I just can't help it but laugh when I think about it. Really. How ironic?

In the end, what happened in the past doesn't really matter, because it is no longer important to me. I'm just grateful that we will continue to be able to share our lives with one another.

Sorry I kinda had gone way off topic. I just can't help it.

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

IMO she's just torturing you [with just cause, I might add]...

Re: Do not know...whats going to happen
 

that's why i'm so weary about trusting anyone eventhough that's what a relationship is based on, i ended up telling one boyfriend but after we broke up he threatened to tell all of my close circle of friends (and he did tell a handful who had no clue), thankfully i was already outside the u.s. but decided to avoid all contact with him otherwise he might put relatives in jeopardy & who knows what else

I feel bad for you esp since you now feel your parents will blame u if something happens, keep us posted but good luck im sorry just pray & hope she has a heart somewhere...that is the most evil way to get back @ someone cus it's not just you but ur family who didn't do anything