i know how you feel...my dad is also the only source of income in our household...without him and his license (from another state, so it can be a problem sometimes) we would be NOTHING. Not where i live in at least.
His job also depends heavily on driving, and hes had numerous encounters with the police that scared us shitless...

I hope everything gets straightened out...i mean it sounds fishy that he got charged with a violation he wasnt even informed of...