I just remembered that episode of Hey Arnold! with that guy that couldn't read and a little boy comes up to him and says "Can't you read mister, can't you read?"
__________________
Application Sent to USCIS Phoenix - 8/29/2012 - California Service Center
Biometrics - 9/24/12
Approved - 10/1/12
EAD Arrived - 10/6/12