Well living as a gay girl on top of being immigrant has definitely had its toll on me. It is very *very* hard what we have to go through as yes, we are judged and stereotyped in possibly the biggest two ways that we live our lives. I work in a very conservative area (Orange County) and the amount of people quietly telling me things about "them" is just heartbreaking. No one at my job knows I am gay, or immigrant and it is a very troubling thing. I have had people tell me that they know immigrants are all kidnappers and AZ did a good thing with their awful law. I have had other people make gay jokes in front of me or go "eww" at gay couples that may be there. I had a lady once tell me that she may have druggies, sexual predators and crazies in her family but at least god didn't punish her family with "any of those gays". I am out to all my friends about my sexuality, I am out to my best friends about my legal status. But at the end of the day it sucks. It sucks because I will always be an outsider, always. I cannot remember a day where I was not hiding either thing one way or another. I hate that.

My mom says DACA is for now until I find someone to marry then I can get my green card. Right, if she only knew. I feel like being gay and immigrant you have to work a million times harder to get ahead. I have this feeling of pulling and wanting to be let free, and yet I have all these ropes holding me back and preventing me from that complete freedom and honesty I so crave. I am very lucky to have such wonderful friends whom at my lowest points have helped me through it. Yes I have thought about suicide, because of both things.

I do feel that being an immigrant has a bigger toll on me. How awful it is to work hours on homework, go to school with no sleep and pass that test, midterm or final with 100%. Then change and go to work, to take orders from some racist/homophobe people, make their food and clean bathrooms. It's such a degrading feeling because we know intellectually we are above them and to work below them for something that is out of our hands is freaking devastating.