your feelings are understandable.

to be so limited by invisible shackles when you know that, if you did not have them, you could be so much more is very debilitating. and especially when those shackles really are unwarranted.

to echo another poster, i suggest you ask your husband to take care of the kids now and again and to leave you alone so you can cry and let all of your feelings out. just let them gush out because you have them and because you need to feel them to let them go.

then--and hopefully with a clearer mind--think of some ways you can help yourself. you mention you have a husband - can he help sponsor you? are your children very young? it there is no other recourse than to wait this out, then keep feeling your feelings but always remember to push forward.

one thing that has changed is that we are adults now. many of us, well educated. there are other places to live, and this is a freedom we did not have as younger folk. and should we choose to wait here, we also have more recourse than we did back then.

things will work out, you'll see. xoxo.