Eh honestly, even if you had this item you'd be curled up in bed sad over something else. This is your greatest opportunity and you are sad. Millions would love to be in your shoes, with a work permit, free from deportation with the public having a positive view on you.

Make money, get that education, get yourself a new girl. Clearly she's missing out and wants to miss out. You can lead a high quality life and even being a citizen doesn't move the needle much anymore nowadays.

Most citizens are having a difficult time in the labor market with the stagnant wages, the stagflation, the rising cost of living because pumping money into the economy only degrades it further as things will simply just cost more because there's more dollars available, the trade wars blowing up any future prosperity, the stock market crashing and burning, I could go on but you already have 99% of the benefits of living in the states. Is the ability to vote even a benefit when people willingly vote for economic destruction? Does it even matter when most people don't even care enough to vote? Legit uninterested and unbothered to do it but they will whine about the cost of living all day. They will work like a mule for low wages and do nothing electorally. Idk doesn't seem like it does them much good. Not that being undocumented is great. I mean lol they think we own all the houses, do all the drugs, do all the crime, and use up all the welfare but lmao the stupid will willingly swallow convenient lies.

You can work, save money, just simply live life without armed unbadged thugs chasing you down like the old days. I'd suggest seeking a mental health professional, they will help you out and put you back into a winning situation like you deserve.