imashadow
12-21-2007, 11:46 PM
I guess my story begins when my father came into this country looking for a better life. He came here 2 to 3 years before I did. I came here on August of 98, when I was ten. I came with my mother and small sister.
I'm from Mexico, and I crossed the border from a town called Agua Prieta into the town of Douglas in Arizona. I don't recommend the trip nor am I proud of it, I just didn't have a choice, my parents wanted a better life and I got it, well, sort of.
I came to the US in the fifth grade and took two years of ESL. Afterwards I was competent enough to take any class in the school.
My undocumented status didn't really play part in my raising, I was always encouraged by my parents to do well in school. I was not the best, but I was pretty close. But than my status slapped me across the face when I was junior in high school. The person behind the valedictorian was undocumented and she didn't go to any school so I had very little hopes I was going to. My senior year was pretty depressing compared to those of my friends. I had no hope of going to college, no one undocumented had at my high school. But something happened, I was accepted at a certain public university. One of the best and was given a scholarship that covered everything. My freshman year was horrible because for once in my life I found myself at a place where I was not surrounded by people like myself. Eventually I learned that there are only two undocumented students at a school of over 17,000, myself and a girl. I suffered in my first year from clinical depression. In addition to family problems, I had to see how many of my new friends took everything that I ever wanted for granted. I have never held a job, or driven legally. I'm terrified of the police, terrified of being found out. Many of my friends know of my status but they don't really know what it is to feel some of the things that I feel. They don't know how alone I can feel on a daily basis when I see that them and I are not so different and yet we are. I have done things they can't even imagine, and feel so very alone when there is only one other person who knows how I feel. To be afraid and alone are feelings that I do not recommend for anyone. Now though, I see a new fight in the horizon, which is how in the world am I going to get a job. I feel great now that I found a community of people like myself, god knows I read enough hatred and bigotry out in the internet, even from some of my own friends who don't know my status. I don't know what to expect from joining this forum, but I am SO HAPPY to found others like me.
I'll call myself Manuel, for protecting myself. I don't know who can be out there.
I'm from Mexico, and I crossed the border from a town called Agua Prieta into the town of Douglas in Arizona. I don't recommend the trip nor am I proud of it, I just didn't have a choice, my parents wanted a better life and I got it, well, sort of.
I came to the US in the fifth grade and took two years of ESL. Afterwards I was competent enough to take any class in the school.
My undocumented status didn't really play part in my raising, I was always encouraged by my parents to do well in school. I was not the best, but I was pretty close. But than my status slapped me across the face when I was junior in high school. The person behind the valedictorian was undocumented and she didn't go to any school so I had very little hopes I was going to. My senior year was pretty depressing compared to those of my friends. I had no hope of going to college, no one undocumented had at my high school. But something happened, I was accepted at a certain public university. One of the best and was given a scholarship that covered everything. My freshman year was horrible because for once in my life I found myself at a place where I was not surrounded by people like myself. Eventually I learned that there are only two undocumented students at a school of over 17,000, myself and a girl. I suffered in my first year from clinical depression. In addition to family problems, I had to see how many of my new friends took everything that I ever wanted for granted. I have never held a job, or driven legally. I'm terrified of the police, terrified of being found out. Many of my friends know of my status but they don't really know what it is to feel some of the things that I feel. They don't know how alone I can feel on a daily basis when I see that them and I are not so different and yet we are. I have done things they can't even imagine, and feel so very alone when there is only one other person who knows how I feel. To be afraid and alone are feelings that I do not recommend for anyone. Now though, I see a new fight in the horizon, which is how in the world am I going to get a job. I feel great now that I found a community of people like myself, god knows I read enough hatred and bigotry out in the internet, even from some of my own friends who don't know my status. I don't know what to expect from joining this forum, but I am SO HAPPY to found others like me.
I'll call myself Manuel, for protecting myself. I don't know who can be out there.