For those who grew up in the U.S...

Hi guys,

I know that there are probably a lot of you like me. I'm relatively new to this site so if I seem uninformed, sorry. I wanted to share my story here.

First of all, I love the concept of the Dream Act... If only they would give it a chance and have it pass.

My parents moved to the U.S. from Europe when I was 5 years old, taking me and my sister with them. They had a visitor's visa and simply never went back to their home country. Because of this, I grew up in the U.S., attending elementary, middle, and high school there -- shaping my whole life there.

As I grew up from childhood, I started to realize that I didn't have the same rights as my friends and other kids around me (like working or going to college without being approved for a visa). Eventually, I even found out that after I turned 18, I pretty much had to go back to "where I came from" (or in my case, get a student visa so I can stay only for as long as I attend college).

I've tried searching for solutions, but I don't believe I'm even eligible to apply for citizenship, because all those years of living there don't count as "permanent residence", since I didn't live there with a green card -- and getting a green card seems even messier.

Is there hope for people like us?
It's unfair. We grew up here and built our friendships and dreams here -- just like those who were born in the country. If we were children at the time that we came, it was beyond our control.

So what now? Are the only options 1) Go back to your "home" country, or 2) Take a chance and MAYBE get approved for a Visa where you can stay TEMPORARILY, or 3) Be lucky enough to get married to someone you met while here?
Good luck to all the Dreamers.

~BC

Hey, to be frank there is only one option remaining for individuals like you who were brought here at such a young age. Marriage is the only way to resolve it and that is a very big and difficult step as we all know. For someone like me who was brought here at age 12, we could consider moving back but still after living I'm America for over a decade, that would be very difficult. These are VERY testing times. How old are you now?

Hi 2Face. I'm 22 now.
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It's never easy.

In order for you to apply for student visa, you must go back to the country of your origin, in which you will get banned from entering US for 10 years and you will be able to apply when you are 32 years old. Even when you are 32 years old, USCIS might not grant you a student visa because of your prior experience in overstaying.

this works

another option is, if your parents have filed for greencard or adjust your status before 4/30/01, you might get sponsored by a company. (although you must work for the company without paper until you get your greencard.)

You can attend college, even if you are undocumented. How easy it will be depends on your grades in high school, and what state you currently reside in, but it is not impossible. Get a good education and hopefully, the DREAM Act will pass before you graduate, but even if it does not, the knowledge that you gain from your education is not something that can be taken from you, and there are definitely advantages.

A degree from a legitimate institution is valid almost anywhere in the world and it's something to fall on, unfortunately, a high school degree from a US high school might not always be considered equivalent in other countries, but a college degree usually is particularly due to being accredited by not just a national standard but a standard used in universities world wide.

Whatever the scenario, since you are 22, there is no path which would not have you getting a 10 year ban, but every year we keep getting closer to passing the DREAM Act, last time it was the first time it passed the house ever, and it got the majority of the senate, just not enough to defeat the filibuster held by the vast majority of democrats, but we got a few republicans.

My best advice for you is to stay here and finish college. Maybe you will meet someone you love in college and get married. If DA still hasn't pass when you graduate, then you can consider going back "home".

Hey B,

I'm similar to you in that respect, except I was brought here when I was a little over 1 years old. I've basically been lied to up until the summer before I started college when I was 18.5 years old. I came from the Philippines and I'm the oldest of 3 younger siblings who were lucky enough to have been born here.

I came on a tourist visa and overstayed. My parents thought they could still try to hide my status from me even beyond college because they were holding out on something like the Dream Act, but when my college sent me an email that I needed a valid ID to show to attain my student ID, that's when my parents were forced to finally tell me everything.

I know the desperation you feel. I hated the fact that my perception of marriage would now be colored with thoughts of my status, and how marriage is basically my only option left.

I did manage to find a guy during my time in college last year (I'm currently in my junior year), and he offered to marry me a few months ago, but I keep running into obstacles. His parents think we're rushing into this and want us to wait a year, but my dad, being a goddamn conservative Catholic Filipino, won't allow us to live in together for that extra year unless we're already married. So I don't know what to do. I'm afraid for my guy for any consequences if we were to elope.

I'd be okay with living with my parents after I graduate and wait out that year to marry by bf, but I hate my parents so much - even before I knew about my status I knew something was wrong with me and I knew it was their fault. So I might be selfish here, but to go back to living with them would be hell. But again, considering that I do have a way out seems me being selfish when I look at it.

As sucky as the situation is, there's nothing wrong with you just because you're undocumented. You're no less of a person or any less smart or pretty (ok, I wouldn't know, but we'll take that as a given ) for it. Legal status is something that isn't set in stone for the rest of your life, no matter Lamar Smith's attempts to make it that way. There are always opportunities out there, even if they're crazy hard to find. In the long run, you'll have incredible stories to tell your kids and grand-kids once things themselves out.

you could always tell daddy to fuck off and you know, do the adult thing of 'anything you want'....

Well, Ali, it just goes to show how much you are divorced from reality.

Because I can't get a job, I can't financially support myself. That's where dear ol' dad comes in. I know I'm lucky enough to be able to go to college, but guess who's paying for it? Dear ol' dad. And he makes sure to take every opportunity to remind me of that.

If I don't have money somewhere, that means he has the final approval of where I can live, unfortunately. So yeah, it does matter a lot in my situation how conservative and a pretend-Catholic he is since I can't support myself. That's the problem with people in our situation. We are being held hostage BY the SITUATION.

So you can imagine how I can't fucking wait for the day when I can finally support myself financially and finally have a say in what I do with my own life.

Or maybe you can't imagine, Ali. As you demonstated very well with your thoughtful and empathetic post.

And being an adult doesn't mean you can do "anything you want." You have responsibilities, legal or illegal, as an adult.